Faking It

I love summer and I love music and these are some of the songs that have been blasting from my car competing with the air conditioning for who will blow my ear drums out. What have you been listening to this summer? "Don't Take The Money" by Bleachers "Cleopatra" by The Lumineers "Bad Liar" by Selena Gomez "You Don't Know Me" by Jax Jones ft. Raye "Every Single Night" by Computer Games

Allergies are in the air! Itchy eyes, itchy nose, itchy throat; basically, life sucks for everyone. Confession: I had a booger on my nose for who knows how long. I scratched my nose and could see my nose ring out of my peripheral vision. Except it was on the wrong side of my face. So I felt for it where the piercing actually is to make sure it hadn't fallen out or wasn't sitting at some bizarre angle and it was right where I left it. But I could still see it on the right side of my nose. And when I went to feel what it was, it was a booger. So that's awesome. Pass the tissues, we're all disgusting.

I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a klepto. But I just love to confess to it; I think maybe it'll absolve me of my responsibility for taking pens or post-its or the little stainless steel sauce cups they bring ketchup in at restaurants. Confession: When the batteries run low in my mouse at work, I just trade them out with the batteries in my coworkers mouse. Leaving theirs dead. Yes. I'm a monster. I know.

Today's my Birthday. I love my Birthday. And it's Tuesday. So how about a confession? Birthday Fail Confession: I always try to do new things but if we know anything, it's that I will find some way to mess it up. Like the year that I wanted to go swimming and ignored my mom... you know, like a moron... when she told me not to mix friends and invited both my group of friends from school and my group of friends from church who refused to mix together and I ended up swimming by myself. Or when I turned 25 and hosted a dinner at my house and wanted to make whoopies pies because I thought it would be a funny dessert. But I set the whoopie pies on fire... twice. I only had wax paper and thought that would be fine. It wasn't. And after I botched the first batch thought, "let's try that again!" you know... like a moron. The flames were really big and my tiny apartment was instantly full of smoke. But the smoke detectors never went off... Or this year. I