Hold A Hand For Cover
And the past 2 weeks has faded away.
This week I had the moment where I remembered why I am in El Paso. On Wednesday this week I had orientation at UTEP so I got to meet most of my cohort; there are 12 new PhD's and 4 Masters students. It was like a huge weight off my shoulders because up until then I had no reason to be in El Paso. Since I arrived here EVERYTHING has been so hard! My parents moved to a different country with 3 kids and a dog and they didn't have as difficult a time as I've had moving 2 states away. I thought, back in April when I made the decision to come to UTEP and move to El Paso, that all roads were leading me here. The decision was so easy! And then I get here and Texas knows I hate it and has been trying to shove me out. But orientation has put me back on track.
Now a whole new set of fears.
Mostly, orientation was filling out and filing paperwork. As a grad student I get a waiver on out of state tuition which is amazing and a huge reason I chose this program, so had to fill out and file that paper. Got into the system as an employee and did the direct deposit forms so I get paid in October--they withhold the first months check. I tried to register for classes on Wednesday but it didn't happen, so I've waited a few days and tried again about half an hour ago and it still didn't work so hopefully I can get answers as to why this is still occurring. Because without being registered for classes, the University won't let me purchase a parking pass for whatever reason, or get my financial aid which is starting to become crucial because I'd love to pay my rent.
But I did my part. I filled everything out and got it filed so I'm expecting things to start happening. In addition to all the boring housekeeping, I also met with Dr. Cohn who's serving as an advisor for now; apparently the position gets shifted between the professors so his term is up but he's welcomed in the new cohort for the fall. The Program of Study (POS) is pretty basic and laid out already it's just about picking classes within it and finding the appropriate times for them because I'm also working as a Teacher's Assistant and working in a research lab so we have to consider all that. But I'm happy with my schedule for the most part.
I'll be taking a statistics class, it's focused on ANOVA so that should be interesting...I suck at stats. I bust my butt which is why I do as well as I do, but this just feels like a different level. I'm also taking a class called Clinical Issues in Legal Psychology. I had a choice between this class or a Cognitive Psychology class which I remember hating in undergrad but my teacher also tried to give us oral exams which was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever experienced. But it's also a breadth class which will be offered more often whereas the elective classes come around much less often so I figured it would be to my advantage to take this one now in case it isn't offered again for a few years.
I'm nervous about it because I've never been interested in Clinical Psych, but the description sounds exactly like what I love about Legal Psych because we'll be covering things like psychopathy, mentally disordered offenders, the insanity defense, competency to stand trial, etc. and the professor I'm working with is teaching it and she told me that it was appropriate for a first year student, and the emphasis on clinical would be minimal so I'm feeling a little better about it. I'm also doing first year research as one of my courses, but technically it's not a course but more of a way of life.
So that's essentially my school schedule but I met with Jennifer, the faculty member I'll be working with, today and she introduced me to her lab work and that will be interesting. It's completely different than the work I did with Dr. Coon at ASU but I'm excited about it because it merges Psychology and the Criminal Justice system and I haven't been involved in anything like that yet.
I'm nervous about it all. It's the next step and I'm in a completely new environment physically for sure, but also in that I'm treated more like a colleague than a student. I've never wanted anything more than I want to do well at this so hopefully I'm enough.
Last night I also had the opportunity to meet a few people from the program which was nice. I got an email inviting everyone out for drinks so I went and there were only a few people but it was great to go somewhere new, a bar that reminded me of Salty Senorita in Phoenix, and to chat with a few people. The PhD's who were there had plenty to say about the upcoming stats class, but as it's required for all of the incoming students we're all in it together. According to them, the professor who teaches this course views it as a right of passage for first year students and makes a lot of sports references and gives a 6 hour final exam.
Something to look forward to.
"In the end the great truth will have been learned, that the quest is greater than what is sought,the effort finer than the prize, the victory cheap and hollow were it not for the rigor of the game."
But the prize better be good. Being a Psychologist better be awesome.
This week I had the moment where I remembered why I am in El Paso. On Wednesday this week I had orientation at UTEP so I got to meet most of my cohort; there are 12 new PhD's and 4 Masters students. It was like a huge weight off my shoulders because up until then I had no reason to be in El Paso. Since I arrived here EVERYTHING has been so hard! My parents moved to a different country with 3 kids and a dog and they didn't have as difficult a time as I've had moving 2 states away. I thought, back in April when I made the decision to come to UTEP and move to El Paso, that all roads were leading me here. The decision was so easy! And then I get here and Texas knows I hate it and has been trying to shove me out. But orientation has put me back on track.
Now a whole new set of fears.
Mostly, orientation was filling out and filing paperwork. As a grad student I get a waiver on out of state tuition which is amazing and a huge reason I chose this program, so had to fill out and file that paper. Got into the system as an employee and did the direct deposit forms so I get paid in October--they withhold the first months check. I tried to register for classes on Wednesday but it didn't happen, so I've waited a few days and tried again about half an hour ago and it still didn't work so hopefully I can get answers as to why this is still occurring. Because without being registered for classes, the University won't let me purchase a parking pass for whatever reason, or get my financial aid which is starting to become crucial because I'd love to pay my rent.
But I did my part. I filled everything out and got it filed so I'm expecting things to start happening. In addition to all the boring housekeeping, I also met with Dr. Cohn who's serving as an advisor for now; apparently the position gets shifted between the professors so his term is up but he's welcomed in the new cohort for the fall. The Program of Study (POS) is pretty basic and laid out already it's just about picking classes within it and finding the appropriate times for them because I'm also working as a Teacher's Assistant and working in a research lab so we have to consider all that. But I'm happy with my schedule for the most part.
I'll be taking a statistics class, it's focused on ANOVA so that should be interesting...I suck at stats. I bust my butt which is why I do as well as I do, but this just feels like a different level. I'm also taking a class called Clinical Issues in Legal Psychology. I had a choice between this class or a Cognitive Psychology class which I remember hating in undergrad but my teacher also tried to give us oral exams which was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever experienced. But it's also a breadth class which will be offered more often whereas the elective classes come around much less often so I figured it would be to my advantage to take this one now in case it isn't offered again for a few years.
I'm nervous about it because I've never been interested in Clinical Psych, but the description sounds exactly like what I love about Legal Psych because we'll be covering things like psychopathy, mentally disordered offenders, the insanity defense, competency to stand trial, etc. and the professor I'm working with is teaching it and she told me that it was appropriate for a first year student, and the emphasis on clinical would be minimal so I'm feeling a little better about it. I'm also doing first year research as one of my courses, but technically it's not a course but more of a way of life.
So that's essentially my school schedule but I met with Jennifer, the faculty member I'll be working with, today and she introduced me to her lab work and that will be interesting. It's completely different than the work I did with Dr. Coon at ASU but I'm excited about it because it merges Psychology and the Criminal Justice system and I haven't been involved in anything like that yet.
I'm nervous about it all. It's the next step and I'm in a completely new environment physically for sure, but also in that I'm treated more like a colleague than a student. I've never wanted anything more than I want to do well at this so hopefully I'm enough.
Last night I also had the opportunity to meet a few people from the program which was nice. I got an email inviting everyone out for drinks so I went and there were only a few people but it was great to go somewhere new, a bar that reminded me of Salty Senorita in Phoenix, and to chat with a few people. The PhD's who were there had plenty to say about the upcoming stats class, but as it's required for all of the incoming students we're all in it together. According to them, the professor who teaches this course views it as a right of passage for first year students and makes a lot of sports references and gives a 6 hour final exam.
Something to look forward to.
"In the end the great truth will have been learned, that the quest is greater than what is sought,the effort finer than the prize, the victory cheap and hollow were it not for the rigor of the game."
But the prize better be good. Being a Psychologist better be awesome.
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