Confession Challenge: Nicknames

I hadn't planned on making Tuesday "confession" day. But it happened that way for two weeks in a row and now people can't live without it.

And by people, I mean Devon. And by live without, I mean he may actually riot. He's a new friend, I'm not really sure what he's about. 

I just posted, literally almost two hours ago, but it wasn't a traditional confession and he got on Facebook demanding a confession and went as far as to challenge me, knowing full well I couldn't resist.

So. The challenge extended is thus:

"Awkward nicknames parents or friends or other had for you."

Challenge accepted.

Confession: I have no nicknames.

When I was born my Dad called me Peanut and that lasted while I was Peanut-sized, but he never called me that growing up. I was Megan. I am Megan. That's it.

And it's always struck me as strange because my entire life was filled with stories of people my Mom and her siblings grew up with. Guys called Dibbly Doughton, Mugs, and Booby Marchand. Proberts give and get nicknames!

There's a grown man, like a 60 year old man, in some small Canadian town in Saskatchewan whose real name is a mystery because when he was a little boy my Uncles moved to his town and decided to call him Dibbly. Because his last name is Doughton. Dibbly Doughton. And they don't remember his real name. I wonder if he does.

Those same jerk Uncles, had a French teacher they didn't like and like all other teenagers were able to immediately zero in on a sensitive physical feature and use it to their advantage. The way they tell it, this man had himself a pair of moobs (man boobs) and they called him Booby. And it spread. Everyone in that town, not just the kids in the high school but the teachers and I am betting everyone who heard it, called this guy Booby Marchand. 

When they were kids, my Uncles called my Nana "Mugs." My cousin's name is Aaron and his family call him Arthur. My sister's name is Erin and we call her Odie Tang. One of my other cousins (who will remain nameless for obvious reasons in a second) was called Flopsy until well into adolescence because he used to run around naked. My other sister Kelly has so many nicknames that we call her Nick as a shorthand version of 'Nickname.'

I'm not above any of this. It's rare to know me for longer than an hour without having me call you 'honey' or 'baby' or 'guy' or something endearing. My friend Nicki just made an unfortunate spelling error and she will forevermore be "Corky" to me. 

Just as an aside, how long is a nickname supposed to last? I love sports, and you always see full grown men on the field called "Big Baby" or even "Dougey." At what age do you stop being Bobby and just become Bob? And how do you get rid of a truly unfortunate nickname like a guy my friend dated for two minutes whose last name sounds like Penis and all these years later, I still call him that (technically I call him Peen-sis because I am a grown up).

But I have never had a nickname. And you can't give one to yourself unless you're a mo fo rapper or something, but even then your friends will never truly accept you. 

So there you go, Devon. Come to confession guys, it is Tuesday after all. Tell me your embarrassing, awkward nicknames! And if you have a confession challenge, let's hear it. I'm game.