Did You Mean to Confess That?
I was told when I was younger that people always say what they really mean. That you may not intend to say it out loud, but it's a true reflection of the way they really feel.
When I was a kid I thought that was pretty harsh; I think we can all think of times we've said something we didn't mean to. I said lots of hurtful things because I was angry or defensive and sometimes I really wanted to hurt someone and I knew what to say to do it. Growing up though, I held on to this idea that we say what we mean. And recently, a lot of my friends have taken such delight in the bizarrely honest things that come out of my mouth or show up on my face even when I'm determined not to say anything.
I constantly hear something along the lines of, "I think the things you're saying, I wish I would say it."
Confession: I mean every word.
When I think back on the times when I've said something sincere or funny or hurtful, I know, in most cases at least, I never should have said it, but I meant every word.
Not a pretty thing to admit. But I'm honest or at least I try to be. Everyone seems to value honesty, but not everyone actually is. But being honest doesn't mean saying every thing that pops into your head. There are plenty of things that I keep to myself because I know it will hurt someone or that it isn't going to benefit them. Just because I think something, believe something, doesn't mean I have the right to say it. But sometimes it just pops out and then I hate myself.
But that's just my experience. I'm introspective. I know my thoughts and the things I believe. I don't understand my feelings in general right now (they're just coming at me from all directions, it's very disconcerting) but I do know this about myself. I don't say things I don't mean. I don't sugar coat things to make them easier.
So do other people say things they don't mean? Because they're angry? Or defensive? Because they want to be hurtful? What about you? Do you mean what you say?
Also. It was #4.
When I was a kid I thought that was pretty harsh; I think we can all think of times we've said something we didn't mean to. I said lots of hurtful things because I was angry or defensive and sometimes I really wanted to hurt someone and I knew what to say to do it. Growing up though, I held on to this idea that we say what we mean. And recently, a lot of my friends have taken such delight in the bizarrely honest things that come out of my mouth or show up on my face even when I'm determined not to say anything.
I constantly hear something along the lines of, "I think the things you're saying, I wish I would say it."
Confession: I mean every word.
When I think back on the times when I've said something sincere or funny or hurtful, I know, in most cases at least, I never should have said it, but I meant every word.
Not a pretty thing to admit. But I'm honest or at least I try to be. Everyone seems to value honesty, but not everyone actually is. But being honest doesn't mean saying every thing that pops into your head. There are plenty of things that I keep to myself because I know it will hurt someone or that it isn't going to benefit them. Just because I think something, believe something, doesn't mean I have the right to say it. But sometimes it just pops out and then I hate myself.
But that's just my experience. I'm introspective. I know my thoughts and the things I believe. I don't understand my feelings in general right now (they're just coming at me from all directions, it's very disconcerting) but I do know this about myself. I don't say things I don't mean. I don't sugar coat things to make them easier.
So do other people say things they don't mean? Because they're angry? Or defensive? Because they want to be hurtful? What about you? Do you mean what you say?
Also. It was #4.
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